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I’VE lived through a fair few economic crises over the years but I have a sneaking suspicion that the monster heading our way this autumn will be a Defcon 2, planet-killing, extinction-level event.

They say that inflation might hit 13 per cent but anyone in any kind of business knows that it’s gone way beyond that already.

7Liz Truss could be Britain's next PM, faced with leading us out of the crisisCredit: Getty

The cost of fertiliser, for example, has shot up from under £200 a ton last year to around £1,000 a ton now.

I’m no mathematician but that doesn’t sound like a 13 per cent rise to me.

Steel, concrete, timber, even feathers used to stuff furniture, have all shot up by a ­similar amount.

The only consolation is that shoppers won’t be asked to pay for these increases because, thanks to a combination of ­various things, there will be nothing on the shelves to buy.

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Meanwhile, energy prices are going through the roof.

And we can’t solve the problem by fracking our own gas from beneath the Lancashire countryside because an eco-enthusiast called Tarquin has glued himself to a nearby hill.

Still, look on the bright side, because things will get worse when China invades Taiwan.

This will cause the leader of the free world, Joe Biden, to put down his Horlicks and stumble over to a mic, where, after shaking hands with a person who isn’t there and waving to an audience that exists only in his head, he will say “pssstfunuergh dis er um disterble”.

This will be interpreted by Captain Hank J Dieselburger aboard the USS submarine Thunderhawk as an order to start torpedoing various Chinese warships, which will cause what’s left of the world’s economies to go into freefall.

Plus, we will impose sanction on China which means we won’t be able to buy anything from there.

Which in this day and age, means we won’t be able to buy anything at all, apart from an apple pie from the local farm shop. Which will cost £4,000million.

At this point, things will get really bad.

7China invading Taiwan could send the world's problems over the edgeCredit: Getty Going to get hungry

Historically, Russia and Ukraine have produced about 25 per cent of all the world’s grain.

And while a handful of ships are now tiptoeing out of Ukrainian ports loaded with wheat, the fact is that the world has lost a quarter of what it needs to survive.

To make matters worse, farmers elsewhere in the world will not be able to afford to use as much fertiliser as they’d like.

So their yields will be down by about a fifth.

This means that somewhere in the world, people are going to get hungry.

And it won’t be in Guildford or Harrogate. It’ll be in Africa and the Middle East.

Which will cause millions of people to up sticks and move to Europe.

7The economic crisis will lead to more migrants coming to the UKCredit: Getty Images - Getty

The migration we’ve seen so far is a trickle compared to what’s coming.

It really is problem after problem after problem.

And who will be charged with steering the ship as it’s battered from all sides by the effects of geopolitics and war?

Yes, it’s Liz “Pork Markets” Truss. Give me strength.

Lakes's lacking a mint 7You can visit the Lake District, but don't travel by carCredit: Getty

AS there is very little public transport in the Lake District, visitors are forced to go there by car.

Only now, they won’t be able to park anywhere because town hall killjoys have festooned all the local roads with double yellow lines, and announced the wardens will leap from the hedge and issue a £70 fine to anyone who ignores them.

Right. I see. So without tourists, the area will have to rely for an income on what exactly?

The giant factory in Ambleside that makes semiconductors?

Yes, that’s right, there isn’t one. There’s just a shop selling Kendal mint cake to visitors who can’t get there any more.

Locals say the traffic spoils a designated “area of outstanding natural beauty”.

But what’s the point of having an AONB if no one’s allowed to see it?

A money mountain

A MAN called Jean Marc Peillex, who’s the French mayor of a town near Mont Blanc, is so fed up with rambling types falling off cliffs that anyone who sets off on a hike is now being forced to pay a deposit of £12,600 before being given a licence.

This, he says, is to cover the cost of the mountain rescue team that has to recover your body and, chillingly, your funeral expenses.

Paul was a ’fella of unexpected talents 7Goodfella star Paul Sorvino (third L-R) was so convincing in his roleCredit: Alamy

PAUL SORVINO, the actor who played mob boss Paulie in the classic movie Goodfellas, has died.

He was so convincing in the role, I half expected to discover as I read his obituary that in real life, he liked hijacking lorries and doing armed robberies.

But no. It turns out that he was a passionate opera singer with a keen interest in poetry.

It's the barmy and navy 7A warship is not supposed to be a holiday campCredit: PA

WOMEN on board the Navy’s newest aircraft carrier, HMS Prince Of Wales, say they felt “uncomfortable” when they were summoned to the captain’s office. Diddums.

It’s a warship, for crying out loud. It’s meant to be uncomfortable.
And if they get a bit wobbly-lipped when they are being spoken to by the captain, how are they going to cope when they’re being attacked by a squadron of MiGs?

If I were in charge, I’d keel-haul some sense into them but sadly, I’m not in charge. A wetty is.

Which is why the ship’s former captain, Steve Higham, is under investigation.

Strife on the farm 7Sharing a shower could be good news for Peter CrouchCredit: instagram

I’M sure that after the driest July for 200 years, and the inevitable hosepipe ban, your garden is looking a bit singed and wilty.

Plus, it can’t be much fun having to shower with your wife. Unless you’re Peter Crouch.

But it could be worse. You could be a farmer.

One of my pigs died from heat exhaustion, my potatoes look like sultanas, and my springs are drying up, which means that to stay alive I have to suck the moisture out of moss. Or drink beer.

Meanwhile, my cows are so hungry they are prepared to walk through an electric fence every day to look for food.

To get round the problem, I spent half a day building a proper fence with posts sunk deep into the bedrock.

But even this was no deterrent to a starving ton of meat and muscle.

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To try to keep them off the road, I’m using bribery, feeding them the hay I cut earlier in the year.

Which means that come the winter, there won’t be enough to go round. I may have to start eating them.

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Tags: features print features the sun newspaper won’t be able we won’t be the world’s which means which means jeremy clarkson economic crises things will get problem after after problem in the world the problem the cost the cost the captain

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Charles Payne and others expose hidden problems with booming jobs report, Peter Doocy presses White House about disappointing economic statistic

Citing Household Survey Data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics, Payne noted that full-time jobs dropped by 71,000, while part-time jobs increased by 384,000, and people who held multiple jobs rose by 92,000.

\u201cHousehold Survey\nFull Time -71,000\nPart Time +384,000\nMultiple Jobs +92,000\u201d — Charles V Payne (@Charles V Payne) 1659708224

The report also found that there were 279,000 fewer people who were self-employed.

\u201cSelf Employed dropping like a stone the past year.\u201d — Frog Capital (@Frog Capital) 1659721317

Federal Reserve Economic Data revealed that 433,000 Americans are working two full-time jobs – which is an all-time high.

\u201c433,000 Americans now working 2 full time jobs.\nThat is an all time high.\u201d — Frog Capital (@Frog Capital) 1659720907

Just The News reported, "This trend of the economy dropping full-time jobs while adding second and part-time jobs has been accelerating since March."

Many people suggest that the surge in part-time jobs and people getting multiple jobs is because they are facing soaring inflation month after month. In July, inflation hit 9.1% – the highest in more than 40 years.

Despite the Biden administration insisting that the country is not in a recession, key economic statistics suggest otherwise.

According to CNSNews, "The number of Americans not in the labor force – no job and not looking for one – climbed above the 100,000,000 mark again, settling at 100,051,000 in July. That's a 239,000 increase from June; and it follows an increase of 510,000 from May to June, when the number rose to 99,812,000."

\u201cOver 100 million people who 'can' work are not.\n1,016,000 people have left the labor force since March of this year.\nThese people still consume, but now are not producing.\nBy definition, this creates inflation.\u201d — Frog Capital (@Frog Capital) 1659788544

The BLS announced that real average hourly earnings were down 3.6% year-over-year for June.

\u201cReal average hourly earnings down 3.6 percent over the 12 months ending June 2022 #BLSdata\u201d — BLS-Labor Statistics (@BLS-Labor Statistics) 1658272200

Brownstone Institute president Jeffrey A. Tucker said, "We are living through the longest consecutive month-by-month decline in real personal disposable income since 1959, and it is combined with a most recent 16% increase debt service as a percent of that same income stream. Translation: dramatic moves toward personal impoverishment."

The Wall Street Journal pointed out, "The labor-force participation rate—or the share of adults working or seeking a job – ticked down to 62.1% in July from 62.2% a month earlier."

"While the economy has recovered all the jobs it lost since February 2020, there are still 623,000 fewer people in the workforce, a factor that has pushed up wages due to a demand for workers that is well above the number of available workers," the outlet added.

Before the pandemic, the participation rate was 63.4% in February 2020.

The BLS defines the labor force participation rate as "the number of people in the labor force as a percentage of the civilian noninstitutional population," and "the participation rate is the percentage of the population that is either working or actively looking for work."

New York Times economic reporter Ben Casselman wrote, "The labor force participation rate actually fell slightly in July, a discouraging sign for those hoping the strong labor market would bring workers off the sidelines. Participation ticked up slightly among prime-age workers, but remains below its May peak."

Former Federal Reserve insider Danielle DiMartino said, "Warning in the weeds: Labor force participation rate AND wage growth falling most among those who benefited the most from the post-pandemic stimulus spending."

On Friday, Fox News White House reporter Peter Doocy confronted White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre about the declining labor participation rate.

Doocy asked, "The labor force participation rate is at its lowest level of the year now. Why do you think that is?"

Jean-Pierre replied, "So, participation actually ticked up."

Doocy interjected, "It declined 0.1 percentage points to 62.1 percent — the lowest level of the year."

Jean-Pierre responded, "So it actually ticked up for prime-age workers, when you look at 25 to 54, and for workers 65 and plus. The tick down this month was actually about teenagers. And it’s important to keep in mind that the labor force participation rate has bounced back relatively quickly compared to its pace in the past. So we have seen an uptick in the labor force."

\u201cKJP: "So, participation actually ticked up and for--for--"\n\nDoocy: "It declined 0.1 percentage points to 62.1%, the lowest level of the year."\n\nKJP: "So, it actually ticked up for prime-age workers...The tick down this month was actually about teenagers."\u201d — Curtis Houck (@Curtis Houck) 1659726920

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